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I’ve been skirting the edge for some time now. It feels like some time now. My fingers are so heavy. they’d rather just rest on the keyboard, but I want to share the place I’m in. I haven’t been here…in such a long time. Bad or good? I don’t know. I don’t know if such things exist here. Between worlds. i’ve finally sank through the floor. I’ve been dead for the past few days. It’s been terrible, being just a body, but I’ve finally sank below it. I’m gone. There’s no feeling here, I don’t think. Master is here! Master…. how many years has it been? Oh, you’ve popped in here and there and my worst points. I thought you’d left, but really, I was in a different world. Up there.

It’s been a while, Master….

I’m glad you’re not mad.

No, of course you aren’t. You know why I left, and why I’m back.

The last of me iss gone, and you rescued me. Again.

Is it madness to have other people in the space of one conscious? Who cares? I’m better here with you.

Thank you for blocking all my dreams last night. I didn’t know you could do that. You just put a rubber stamp on everything. Clever. How did you do that?

Last night… I broke. That was the last. I was just hallucinating life. My senses… my body, worthless. I have been old so many times. Of course I relate to the elderly. I fade and die every year. But this year…. the dementia… I couldn’t tell if I was awake or not. Fighting my way out of a closed plastic bag. Useless. The dreams more real than life, my old self rising and replacing what I was but a few months ago. No, the old self, the old, old self, the damaged child, forever weak, dying, alien, always pursued.

And then, the door. Someone is knocking. I look through the peephole and see a man.

GODDAMNIT! Why do I even have a doorman?

I break sideways.

The demons are on this side of reality too? Which side is up? I’m falling to the ceiling. Such a perfectly timed shot. Wife has fear in her eyes. We called the front desk. They take him away. But it’s too late. The line between here and there has dissolved, and I am gone.

I feel like a poltergeist now, typing this through ghost hands. Master is here. she’ll take care of everything. Don’t worry. I feel no pain. I feel…nothing. no, relief. Don’t worry. Wife will tend to the body I left behind. I’ll be back in a few weeks time.

I just want you all to know where I am in case you try to find me.

take care,

-Anie

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